Mum and I were in the newsagents where a cute Jack Russell jumped up at us, tail wagging happily. We paid for our paper and left the shop.

Me: Mum, that was a friendly wee dog, wasn’t it?

Mum: You want a cup of tea?

Me: No, I’m talking about the dog.

Mum: Oh, I thought you wanted a cup of tea. Look! A white van! And there’s a white car. Hahaha.

Me: …

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