Posted in A to Z

F is for Football

Football: more than a game?
Football: more than a game?

In Glasgow, football isn’t a game. It’s a war, a religious war built on bigotry and ignorance.

If you support Celtic you are a catholic, a Tim, a Tim cat, kick with the left foot, a papist bastard.

If you support Rangers you are a Protestant, a proddy, a proddy dog, kick with the right foot, a blue nose bastard.

Either way, on days when there is an Old Firm game, domestic abuse increases by between 70 and 100%.

In Rangers pubs there are framed photos of the King Billy astride his horse and the green baize on the pool tables is replaced by blue. In Celtic pubs you may find tricolors, shamrocks and copious references to Ireland.

It’s all a pile of steaming, foul smelling hooey and makes me ashamed to be a Weegie.

You’re screwed no matter which of the two teams you support. But of you support the jags (Partick Thistle) then you really have problems…




Writer, photographer, creative fantasist.

7 thoughts on “F is for Football

  1. I used to work in a very dodgy pup in the Southside that let both Celtic and Rangers fans drink in it on match days…I lost count of the number of times I was asked if I supported Celtic or Rangers (Neither – can’t stand football and the associated bigotry) so I used to tell them that I supported Partick Thistle. Never got any hassle for saying it…just a lot of pitying looks and a few drinks bought for me when my shift was over!

    C x

  2. Nettie – So fascinating isn’t it how football takes hold of the psyche that way. And so sad about the increase in domestic abuse… It’d be really interesting to see research about why people become so passionately devoted to their teams and all that that identification means…

  3. Gee and there was me thinking the Old Firm was no more, with Rangers being relegated to a lower league? Billy Connolly had such a funny crack about Partick Thistle, he repeated, very slowly, the name Partick. Thistle. F.C. – for the benefit of those who thought the name was Partick Thistle Nil.

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