Posted in Blog Posts

If Only I Knew…

My debut self-published story collection ‘And The Angels Cried and other stories’ is launched on Amazon Kindle tomorrow. I’ve hardly slept for a week and have been obsessively checking and double checking everything. I can do no more.

I have read, with great interest, many blogs written by friends and colleagues who have gone down a similar path to mine and have found them, without exception, to be filled with great advice for the novice self-publisher. Without their help, the tricky process of formatting, negotiating the author interface on Amazon and pricing dilemma would have been much, much harder. But what I haven’t been prepared for is the sheer emotional anxiety of the process.

Maybe it’s just me. I don’t normally consider myself a worrier, but I do obsess about the little things. I am a control freak. There, I’ve said it.

My family are always complaining at how early I choose to leave for appointments because I have a morbid fear of being stuck behind a tractor and turning up late. I re-arrange the dish-washer so that the plates and pots will, in my opinion, have a better chance of being washed properly. I’ll usually take 17 pictures of a subject ‘just in case.’ Can you imagine how out-of-control I feel now the publishing process has begun?

I feel as sure as I can that I haven’t forgotten anything, but what if I’m wrong? What if my friends have just been kind to me all these years and I can’t write for toffee?

Tomorrow will be the proof or not. And to be honest, I just want it over and done with. I can cope with people hating it (I think), but it’s the not knowing that kills me.

I have a new, more serious web site now, dedicated purely to writery stuff where I shall probably call myself an author and postulate on all things grammatical. Want to take bets on how long that lasts? While I am very serious about my writing, I can’t take myself too seriously. My author profile on Amazon is the proof of that. I won’t be giving up on this site – how else would I be able to tell you stories about my mum? – but if you’d like to see what ‘serious Nettie’ looks like, head over to before it all descends into fart jokes and poodles.


Writer, photographer, creative fantasist.

13 thoughts on “If Only I Knew…

  1. Breathe, you will be fine, Nettie. I do know what you mean. I woke up to the nightmare of uploading my old, unedited file. You will do very well, you have a keen eye and I am sure your book is perfect. Good luck, and get some sleep so you can enjoy tomorrow! x

  2. Nettie, First off, congratulations! and second have you thought of the worst case scenario? In the worst case, you pull the book and re-upload. I had your worst nightmare come true when I first formatted 5 Pillars of the Gypsy, uploaded to KDP select, campaigned a very successful give-away (152 downloads in 2 hours) and then the HORROR hit that my book looked like sh** in the format I had uploaded, the images were terrible, the font seemed to have changed entirely… I pulled it immediately, ate humble pie, had it re-done and waited 3 months as per the KDP select contract before re-releasing in e-book format. I was beside myself but it is over and life still happened the next day. 🙂 Still, 152 people think I am a loser LOL
    Wait. This was meant to calm you. I hope it did. 😀

    1. Oh, Lesley! You made me laugh! That is one of my worst nightmares!
      I have used the preview facility to quadruple check every single page. There is one small formatting problem I couldn’t get around- a title on the contents page isn’t lining up properly – but I hope that’s it! Fingers crossed anyway.
      And thank you for sharing your experiences with us xxx

  3. Nettie – I am so very excited for you. I know what you mean about worrying over the details, but honestly, you are a very talented writer and you will do great! Can’t wait to read your stories!!!!

  4. Yup – being an obsessive compulsive isn’t a good way to publish a book – I’m with publishers and I go through all that too. Take heart, sweetie – you couldn’t do worse than I did with my first self-published monstrosity. I did it first – you will be fine. I know the book is excellent – I read it. Now, take my hand, have a cup of tea and munch on some of my homemade fudge – you’ll be great!

  5. I just started to follow your blog and I viewed the excerpt from your newly published book. I was able to read the first story and I loved it! I don’t have a Kindle currently but plan on getting one for Christmas this year and would love to purchase your book at that time 🙂

  6. Big hugs. I can’t wait for tomorrow so I can get a copy. I’m sure it will be ace and massive congrats on reaching this stage! The cover looks fab, too. xx

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